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70 

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WAR SAVINGS SECTION 

WAR LOAN ORGANIZATION 



NING THE WAR 



A Thrift Play 



By 



WIIJXWDEAN CHATTERTON 




W. S. 2H 



/^|-Zfc33l 



A limited number of additional copies of this play 

may be had by addressing the War Savings Section, 

War Loan Organization, Washington, D. G. 



WASHINGTON 

GOVERNMENT PRINTING OFFICE 

1918 



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DEC 2® 



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WINNING THE WAR 

By WELLOWDEAN CHATTERTOIf 



Foreword 

Tins play can be produced very simply, without programs, with 
few properties and little furniture. Screens may bo used instead of 
a curtain. 

The scene in the living room of the Bailey house requires a table, 
writing materials, and a chair at left ; a bench or sofa at center; and, 
if possible, an easy chair and a small table at right. 

The action taking place in the rest billet must follow that in the 
living room instantly, without a change of setting. This can be ac- 
complished in several ways. If curtains are being used, they may be 
dropped; the three soldiers may enter immediately, carrying the 
small properties which they need, soap boxes to sit on, a board and 
paper for writing, and the scene may be played in front of the cur- 
tains. At the end of the scene, when they leave, they should carry 
their properties with them; the curtains should bo opened instantly, 
revealing the living room as before with Mrs. Bailey still reading the 
letter. If screens are used as a background for the rest-billet scene, 
they should be quickly shoved in front of the living-room scene so 
that the action may be taken up immediately. If the settings are re- 
duced to the minimum, as in a school with only a platform, signs may 
be hung up : " The Bailey's Living Room," for the first, second, third, 
nnd last parts; "A rest billet in France," for the fourth — following 
the custom of Shakespeare's Theater. 

If a more elaborate setting is desired and lighting facilities are at 
hand, the rest-billet scene could be set at back of stage concealed by 
screens or a drop curtain until needed. At the proper time the screens 
or curtain could be removed, the front group remaining as they were, 
reading the letter but sunk into darkness by the concentration of 
lights on the back scene. At the end of the rest-billet scene, curtain 
or screens could be replaced and the lighting resumed as at first. In 
this case, the rest-billet scene could be more elaborately set with a cot 
or bench, a soap box with a tin washbasin and a pitcher, and a candlo 
or lantern. 

Costumes should be kept simple ; a Boy Scout suit for Danny, any 
land of a soldier suit for Charlie, a shabby suit for John, and a plain 
dress for Mrs. Bailey. Shabby, khaki-colored clothes and hats will 
do for the soldiers' uniforms. Bob must have a very worn sweater 
under his coat ; Tom must have a good one to take off. 

8930«*— 18 » 



CHARACTERS. 

Jane Bailey. Mrs. Bailey. 

John Bailey. Bob Bailey. 

Charlie Powers. Tom Powers. 

Danny Bailey. George Wilson. 

Marjorie Barton. Dorothy Reed. 

Helen Knowles. Mary Langley. 

Scene: THE BAILEY'S LIVING ROOM. 

I. 

j Jane is hnittmg a sweater when Charlie comes in.'] 

Charije. Hello, Jane. 

Jane {counting her stitches]. Hello, Charlie. One, two, three 

Charlie. Where are the kids ? 

Jane. Four, five, six — Danny's selling War Savings Stamps and — 
seven, eight, nine 

Charlie. Can't you stop that long enough to answer me? 

Jane. Ten, eleven, twelve — what did you say, Charlie? 

Charlie. Good night. I'll get the police to look for John. 

Jane. John's shoveling coal next door. Thirteen, fourteen 

Charlie. Shoveling coal; what for? 

Jane. Fifteen, sixteen — don't talk, Charlie. Seventeen, eighteen — 
to earn money; what do you suppose? Eighteen, nineteen 

Charlle. My mother says some people are going crazy about 
saving. 

Jane. Don't scuff your shoes, Charlie. TAventy, twenty-one 

Charlie. Whose shoes are they? I've got a new pair, anyway. 

Jane. A new pair ! Why, those haven't even been half-soled ! 

Charlie. Mother says it spoils the shape of shoes to be half- 
soled. Anyway, I don't care how many pairs of shoes I wear out. 
My father has lots of money. 

Jane. W 7 hat an awful thing to say, Charlie Powers! Just sup- 
pose some soldier is going without shoes because you have so many 
pairs. 

Charlie. Huh ! Soldiers don't have to buy shoes. The Govern- 
ment gives them beauties. 

Jane. They can't if you use all the leather. 

Charles. I wish I could use it all. Then Brother Tom would 
have to come home and wouldn't get shot. 
4 



WINNING THE WAR. 5 

Jane. Wliy, Charlie, you wouldn't want him to come home before 
he wins the war ! 

Charlie. Oh, we'll win, all right. Don't you want your brother to 
come home? 

Jane. Thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two — goodness! What are you 
doing? 

[Charlie is using up a tablet of paper which he has found on the, 
table.] 

Charlie. Drawing. 

[Jane snatches the tablet.] 

Jane. On perfectly good paper! What will mother say? 

Charlie. She's not my mother. Won't she even let you use paper? 

Jane. We use paper when we have to, but we don't wasto it; and 
you needn't think you can when you're in our house. 

Charlie. Take your old paper. I guess I can draw in this book. 

Jane. Dcn't you touch that book. I have to keep that clean for 
John when he's in the fifth grade. 

Charlie. Do you use secondhand books? I always have new 
ones — sometimes three times a year. 

Jane. How wicked ! Mother says if anything is good enough to 
own, it's good enough to take care of. 

Charlie. I wouldn't have such a mean mother. 

Jane. She's not. 

Charlie. She won't even let you draw. 

Jane. We have to save paper. 

Charlie. Why? They don't need paper in the Army. 

Jane. We ought to save everything. 

Charlie. Huh. She tells you that because she doesn't want you 
to have any fun. 

Jane. Please don't talk. You made me drop a stitch. 

•Charlie. You don't have any fun any more. You just sit around 
and knit. 

Jane. Yes; I do. 

Charlie. You don't call it fun to knit! Wouldn't you rather 
play? 

Jane. I'd rather work for the soldiers. 

Charlie. I bet they wouldn't wear an ugly old thing like that. 
My mother knits me pretty ones — red and green and blue. I bet I 
have more sweaters than you. I've got four. 

Jane. My mother thinks one at a time is enough. 

Charlie. It's no fun coming over here if you're not going to play. 
I'm going to get John. 

Jane. John's busy. 

Charlie. Geo whiz! 

[John enters.] 



6 WINNING THE WAB. 

John. That was some job! 

Charlie. Hello, old coal man ! I've come to see you. 

John. Who asked you? Where's my bank, Jane? 

Jane. You put if behind the clock. 

John. Here's the baby! [He shakes the bank.'] Two more Thrift 
Stamps for me ! 

Charlie. Let me see! Can you break it open? Let's get some 
candy. 

Jane. Candy ! 

John. Candy! 

Charlie. I said candy — c-a-n-d-y. 

Jane. When there's a war going on? 

John. When the fellows over there need sugar? No, siree! 

Charlie. You make me tired. Your mother just tells you that to 
keep you from having any fun. 

John. When I have enough for a War Savings Stamp day after 
to-morrow, you'll wish you'd saved, too. 

Charlie. Shucks ! I have five of them. 

John. I bet you didn't earn them. 

Charlie. I bet I did. [John takes off his overcoat, shmoing a 
shabby suit. Charlie proudly wears a spick and span one, cut like 
his brother Tom's, who is in the Army.] Oh, Oh ! What a funny 
6uit ! 

John. It's not. 

Jane. Don't you care, John. It's not funny. 

Charlie. It is. The coat doesn't match. And look at those .funny 
pants. 

Jane. Charlie Powers, you'd be glad if Bob was your brother, 
so's you could wear his suit cut down. 

Charlie. I wouldn't wear anything anybody else had worn. Only 
ragamuffins do that. 

John. Think you're smart in that uniform, don't you? 

Charlie. My mother says it's the most becoming thing I ever had. 

John. My mother says it's Thrift to wear out our old clothes. 

Charlie. What the matter with your eyes? 

John. Nothing. 

Charlie. What are you crying for? Cry baby ! Cry baby ! 

John. Get out of this house before I throw you out. [Moves to~ 
ward Charlie threateningly.'] 

Jane. Don't waste your energy getting mad, John. Remember 
what mother says. 

John. All right. Where's that coal shovel I have to mend? [He 
yets the shovel and begins to wire the split handle.] 

Charlie. Oh, oh! 



WINNING THE WAK. 7 

[His mirth is about to be curbed by John, who is no longer able to 
restrain himself, when the door opens and Danny enters in a Boy 
Scout uniform.] 

Danny. Hello, kid. [To John.] Hi, Captain. [They salute.] 

Charlie. Captain! 

Jane. Well, he is. He has gotten 50 associate members pledged to 
buy War Savings Stamps. 

[Danny, medal on coat, stands with downcast eyes.] 

John. [Pointing at the medal.] Gee, Danny! Your're an Ace 
Scout ! 

Jane. I call that good work! 

Charlie. What's that? 

Jane. He's sold two hundred and fifty dollars' worth ! Oh, Danny, 
I could hug you. 

Danny. [Avoiding her.] No; you couldn't ! 

[Danny takes off his coat, brushes it, and hangs it up on a hanger.] 

Charlie. Are you goirg to bed? 

Danny. What are you driving at? 

Charlie. You're taking off your clothes. 

Danny. You don't think I'd wear my uniform to work in, do you? 

Charlie. Work! Aren't you going to play with me? 

Danny. Look here, Charlie, I belong to the Home Army and I've 
got to help win this war. 

Charlie. Oh, come on fellows. I have a quarter. Let's go down 
town and spend it. 

John. Spend a quarter! 

Jane. A whole quarter ! 

Danny. Twenty-five cents! Say, Charlie, if you don't want to 
save to win this war, you ought at least to put that quarter where it 
will work for you, instead of spending it. 

Charlie. How can a quarter work? 

Danny. You need educating. Buy Thrift Stamps with your 
quarters and then a War Savings Stamp and in five years Uncle Sam 
will give you back $5 for a stamp that only cost you a little over $4. 
Don't those quarters work? You bet they do. What I save that way 
now will help me get through college. 

Charlie. I don't care. My father will send me to college. 

Danny. Gee ! Are } r ou going to let him save money for you when 
you're a man? Excuse me! That's not the way I do business. 
Where's my old suit, Jane? 

Jane. I put it out on your bed for you. 

Danny [goes out singing]. Gee whiz! I'm glad I'm free; no 
party clothes for me ! 

Charlie. Don't be a stick-in-the-mud, too, John. Let's have some 
fun down town. 



8 WINNING THE WAR. 

John. Put up a quarter and 111 give you a Thrift Stamp. 

Charlie. Aren't you coming out? 

John [continues mending shovel handle] . Can't you see I'm busy? 

Charlie. You're the only one left, Jane. 

Jane. I'll go for a walk or a skate — anything that won't cost, 
money. 

Charlie. Won't your mother let you? 

John. Mother's all right. You've got to stop picking on her. 

Charlie. I'd rather be an orphan than have such a mean mother. 
She doesn't want you to have any fun at all. 

[Danny appears in the door in his old suit and hears this last.'] 

Danny. What are you saying about my mother? We've had 
enough of you, Charlie Powers. 

Charlie. Now, you stop, Danny. 

Danny. Take it back. 

Charlie. You are afraid to spend a cent on anything. 

John. Afraid? Huh! 

Danny. Say that again! 

Jane. Now you've made me drop a stitch ! 

Charlie. Your mother's got you scared out of your life. My 
mother couldn't take me in that way — make me stay in all the time 
and not eat candy or bread and sugar or anything. What's that to do 
with the war? 

Danny. Well, it has. 

Charlie. What? 

Jane. Thrift. 

Charlie, What's Thrift? 

Danny. Saving things. 

Charlie. Did you ever see anybody win a fight by saving things? 
You've got to fight; that's all. What's thrift got to do with it? 
[There is an uneasy silence.] You don't know. 

Jane. Well, it must have something to do with it. I don't care 
what it is. We ought to do it. 

Charlie. Your mother just makes you think yon ought. 

Danny. I could go out if I wanted to. 

Charlie. I dare you. Double dare. Ha ! I knew you wouldn't 
have the nerve. You're going to stick around to put coal in the 
furnace. 

Danny. I won't if I don't want to. 

Charlie. You don't even get paid to do it. 

Danny. Of cour.se I don't. Isn't it our furnace?. 

Charlie. I get paid for everything I do — 25 cents an hour for 
practicing on the piano, and 25 cents for shining my shoes, and 25 
cents for dressing myself and washing my hands. 

Jane. We don't have to be paid to do what is right. 



WINNING THE WAR. 9 

Charlte. That's how easy you are. Shucks ! I could buy a War 
Savings Stamp every day if I wanted to. 

Danny. All right; I'll sell you one every day. 

Charlie. Think you're smart, don't you? I've got five. That's 
all I want. I didn't have to shovel coal or stay away from all the 
fun down town to buy them, either. I'm not that easy. 

John [unable to stand it longer]. Shoot this old thing! 

Charlie. I dare you to come down town. 

Danny. You think I'm afraid? 

Charlie. I see you shaking. 

Danny. All right. I'll show you. 

[lie takes off his old coat and gets his uniform.] 

Jane. Danny, where are you going? 

Danny. Out. 

John [flinging down his shovel]. So am I. 

Jane. Boys ! There's so much to be done. And the furnace has 
to be attended to right so it won't waste coal. 

Danny. Maybe the soldiers don't know I save a shovelful of coal 
a day. 

Jane. Bob knows. 

Charlie. What's it to him? They haven't coal grates in the 
trenches. 

John. That's what I say. I don't believe this old Thrift has any- 
thing to do with the war. 

Jane. Mother says 

Charlie. It's just to keep you from having any fun. 

John. Look at this crazy old suit I have to wear. 

Danny. Wait till I change my clothes. 

Charlie. Can't you shake a quarter out of your bank? 

John. It's just a box. I can open it. 

Jane. Well, I'm not going to be left here alone. I don't care if I 
ever finish this old sweater. 

II. 

[She flings it down, John gets his bank, and Danny starts out with 
his uniform as Mrs. Bailey enters.] 

Mrs. Bailey. How are my little Thrift workers getting along? 

Danny. That's such a silly name to call us, mother. 

Mrs. Bailey. I thought you loved to be called War Savings 
soldiers in the Stay-at-home Army. Can mother help you, Jane? 

Jane. I don't see the use of knitting any more. 

John. Come on, kids. 

Mrs. Bailey. Where are you going, boys? 

Danny. Out. 



10 WINNING THE WAB. 

Mrs. Bailey. I was hoping you'd help mo write a letter to Bob. 
Don't you think it would bo nico to tell him how we're helping him 
win the war? 

Danny [ doubtfully]. How do we know he cares, mother? 

John. Fighting hasn't anything to do with saving. 

Jane. Nor knitting. 

Mrs. Bailey. Oh! Do you think we've been mistaken in trying to 
help Bob and Charlie's brother, Tom, and all the other brothers this 
way ? 

Danny. Now, honest, mother, what's all this war saving got to 
do with the men in the trenches? We're willing to help, but there's 
no fun saving for nothing. 

Mrs. Bailey. Suppose we write Bob and Tom and ask them how 
they feel about it. That would be sensible, wouldn't it? [Tlicrc is 
a pause.'] 

Danny. All right. 

John. Will it take long? 

Mrs. Bailey. Not very. [She gets writing material*,'] I'll write 
and each one can tell me just what he's been doing to save and then 
we'll ask Bob and Tom if they want us to go on doing it. Shall we? 

Jane. I'd rather do what Bob wants. 

Mrs. Bailey. Are you willing to leave it to your brother, Charlie? 
. Charlie. He'd be ashamed to fight with coal and candy and 
sweaters; my brother's a man. 

Mrs. Bailey. We'll ask him. [She writes.] 

Dear Bon and Tom: Jane and Charlie and John and Danny and I want to 
know if we're helping you win the war when we save, at home. 

Is that all right? 

Danny. Tell him I've sent in 30 red post cards for $250 worth of 
War Savings Stamps, and I've saved a shovelful of coal every day 
for a month by putting only a thin hrver of coal in the furnace and 
tending it oftener. Got that down? 

Mrs. Bailey. [Writing.] Yes. And then we'll ask them if it 
helps them when the coal we save is used in factories to make guns 
and ammunition and equipment for them, and when the money we 
save from coal goes into War Savings Stamps. 

John. What's the use of War Savings Stamps? Ask them that. 

Mrs. Bailey. [ Writing.] 

John wants to know if the money the Government gets for War Savings 
Stamps does you any good when it is spent for food and clothes for you. 

Chaelie. Ask them if they can beat the Germans with candy. 

Mrs. Bailey. [Writing.] 

And Charlie wants to know if you really feel rested and get warmth from 
eating sugar. 

Jane, what do you want to ask ? 



WINNING THE WAH; 11 

Jane. I think I'd like to know if it really makes any difference 
if we don't draw on paper. 
Mrs. Bailey: 

Jane asks if not scribbling on paper paves making more paper out of trees 
that ought to be cut down for building ships to carry things to you and aero- 
planes to watch over you. 

John. Well, I don't think I ought to have to look like a raga- 
muffin. 

Mrs. Bailey. [Writing. 1 

John thinks he looks like a ragamuffin in your blue suit that Jane and I 
cut down for him. You remember you used to like the suit, and it makes me 
happy to see it walking around the house, but we wonder if it makes you happy 
to know that John didn't take any men from war work to make him a new 
suit. He didn't use up any cloth, either, because he wanted you to have it 
all for uniforms. Do you want it? Or would you rather have John get a 
new suit? 

John. Oh, now, mother, when you put it that way, you make me 
feel awfully mean. 

Mrs. Bailey. Isn't that what you wanted to ask? 

Charlie. Go on ; send the letter. 

Mrs. Bailey. [Writing.] 

Please let us know right away if we are working hard for nothing, and if 
you'd rather do all the work for us in the trenches and not have us help with 
war saving. 

Now, we'll all sign our names, with love, and say we'd rather 
do the things that will make itjjeasier for them to win the war, and 
please tell us what they are. Danny, you're oldest; you sign first. 

III. 

[As Danny is about to sign, the doorbell rings and Jane answers it. 
Dorothy Reed, Helen Knowles, Marjorie Barton, and Mary Langley 
enter. All rush to meet them.] 

Jane. We were just finishing a letter to send to the boys in France. 

Makjorie. How fine ! I know a letter from home sounds good. 

Helen. Tell them that we are all trying to be good home soldiers, 
won't you ? 

Jane. What shall we tell them for you, Dorothy? 

Dorothy. Sa}' that wo are going to keep the home fires burning 

till they all come home. 
All. [Sing:] 

Keep the homo lires burning 
While your hearts are turning 
To the boys who fight in France 
For you and me. 
Keep the home folks working 
To show that they're not shirking, 
Stand behind the second line 
Till the boys come home. 



12 WINNING THE WAS. 



Helen. I wonder if Bob and Tom and George know woVe thinking 
of them? 

Marjobie. Of course they do. I'm sending them a thought mes- 
sage that will reach them somewhere in France. 
Mary. Do you think it will reach them in No Man's Land ? 
Dorothy. It may, but you know it's a long, winding trail. 
All. [Sing:] 

There's a long, long trail a winding 
Into No Man's Land in France, 
Where the shrapnel shells are bursting, 

But we will advance. 
There'll be lots of drills and hiking 

Before our dreams all come true, 
But we're going to show the Kaiser 
What the Yankee boys can do. 

[The doorbell rings, and John answers it, to receive a letter from 
the postman.] 
John. Oh ! mother, look, lock ! It's a letter from France ! 
Mrs. Bailey. From Bob ! Oh, my children 1 It's from Bob ! 
Danny. Open it, quick. 
Mrs. Bailey [reading] : " ::> 4W ,s " /J ^ v 

Dearest Home People: I am too tired to write a decent letter, but want t» 
let you know we have just come out safely from our first shift in the trenches. 
We took back a few rods for dear old France, so it doesn't matter much that we 
lost all our equipment. 

If you could look into this rest billet l!jp> afraid you wouldn't recognize your 
son. You can't Imagine what five days under fire, in mud and rain, can do t» 
the looks of a fellow. George Wilson and Tom Powers are over in the corner 
getting introduced to themselves. They're calling me to inclose some messages 
in this, so I'll finish over there. 

IV. 

[The curtains are drawn together as she reads and the rest-oittei 
scene is given as directed in the foreword — Bob Bailey, Tom 1'owers, 
and George Wilson acting the scene described in the letter. 

Tom enters, muddy, dilapidated, minus one shoe. He calls bach 
over his shoulder.] 

Tom. Come over to the light, fellows, and let's have a look at our- 
selves. 

[George enters, automatically plowing his way as if in mud ivaist 
high, lie is caked with mud.] 

George [counting his steps]. 97, 98, 99, 100 ». 

Tom. What are you doing, George — knitting? 

George. I've forgotten how many hundred that is. There are 2,500 
steps in the communication trench. 

Tom [shaking him]. Wake up, old man. This is the rest billet. 



WINNING THE WAR. 13 

George [looking dazedly about]. That's funny.- I thought I was 
still dragging through the mud. 

Tom. You're dragging it around with you. Your uniform will 
never see daylight again, Georgic. 

George. If I were running this war, I'd line the trenches with 
cement. Where's a pillow — or a brick? 

Tom [getting a soap box off stage]. Try a compromise. 

George. Wake me up when peace is signed. 

[He drops down heavily, using the box for a pillow. Tom ivies to 
make him sit up.] 

Tom. Don't let go. They may send us right back to relieve the 
148th. 

George. I can relieve them in my sleep. 

Bob [off stage]. Want to send a message home? 
• Tom. Tell them the battle was a draw. I lost a shoe and brought 
back its weight in mud. 

[Bob is. heard coughing off stage. Tom listens; takes off his coat 
and sweater, rolls up the sweater and hides it behind the box, re- 
places his coat, and calls off.] 

Tom. Come over here where I don't have to yell my dictation. 

[Bob enters, carrying xoriting materials. His uniform is torn and 
tattered.] 

Bob. I'm glad mother can't see me writing this letter. 

Tom. I wish she could have seen you going through the barbed 
wire. We're all proud of your rags. 

George. You bet. Good stuff — rescuing our old Searge. 

Bob. Hello! Are you awake enough to add a line to the Stay-at- 
home Army ? 

George. Tell them they've got to fight harder with knitting 
needles. I'm short on socks from the bottom up. 

Bob [writing]. Fine news for Jane. She's a regular sock factory. 

Tom. Tell my mother to cut out the rainbow sweaters and get down 
to khaki color. 

Bob. I'll put it diplomatically. 

Tom [self-consciously]. Anything left of your sweater? 

Bob. I should say so. A large hole all bound round with, a woolen 
string. 

[He coughs as he opens his ragged coat to show only the neck band 
left,] 

Tom. Why don't you cop that Bed Cross sweater? 

Bob [eagerly]. Which? 

Tom. Didn't you see it kicking around here? Chap said to give it 
to the fellow that needed it most. 

[He pretends to look for sweater and hands it to Bob.] 

Bob. God bless the knitting brigade! [He gets into the sweater 
hurriedly.'] Gee, I didn't think I'd ever be warm again. 



14 WINNING THE WAR. 

Tom. Now, get rid of that cough. 

Bon. Why, this sweater has been worn! 

Tom. You're getting mighty particular. 

Bob. Poor chap! He must, have gotten a shell here. [Tie looks 
up suddenly at Tom.'] Why it's scorched where you got that 

[He walks over to Tom and rips open his coat, discovers that Tom 
has ?w sweater.] 

Tom. Stop getting familiar ! 

Bon. You old nut! You can't put anything over on mo like that! 

[Gives hack Tom's sweater.'] 

Tom. Don't be a goat, Bob. We're here to win this war, aren't we? 

George. I'm here to sleep if you'll givo mo a chance. 

Tom. And tho only way to win it is to work together. Wo three 
ought to put everything we have left in tho dump and divy up 
sensibly. 

Bon. But I haven't anything to offer — except a couple of cakes 
of sweet chocolate. 

Tom. Except! When I've been three days without sleep and 
have to march five miles to lio down, a cake of chocolate looks better 
than a dozen sweaters. 

George. You can't get any pep out of one cake. You know what 
I'd do if I were Hoover? I'd put every kid in jail that ate candy. 

Bon. The children in America have already given it up. 

Tom. Good for them ! Nothing else for the dump, Bob ? Gun ? 

Bon. Had to leave that in the German trench. Guess wo won't 
go after it. 

Tom. And I broke my bayonet when wo went over tha top. 
Helmet? 

Bon. It saved my life, but lost its own. 

Tom. Mine's underneath the sand bags that caved in. Gas mask? 
[Bob shakes his head. So does Tom.] Pretty well stripped for 
action, aren't we? How about you George? 

George [growling sleeepily]. I'm not outfitting this army. What's 
the quartermaster's dump for? 

Tom. I forgot them ! Do you suppose they give us a new outfit 
every time we come back from tho trenches? 

Bon. Good gracious, you can't expect tho Government to outfit 
us every other week ! 

George. You could if — Oh, quit waking me up! 

Bon. You make mo tired. I'd like to see you try to clotho tw» 
million men 3,000 miles from home! There were 500,000 men in 
this last battle. Suppose all of them descended upon tho quarter- 
master I 



WINNING THE WAR. 15 

George. I hope they do. Then we'll see whether your wonderful 
Stay-at-home Army has delivered the goods. 

Tom. There ought to be plenty for us if all you say is true about 
the way they've gone in for Thrift. 

Bon [hotly']. Of course it's true. Even the children are working 
for us, knitting and saving money and coal and wearing their old 
clothes and — you know, they've given up white bread and beef, and 
you eat it every day. Yes, you ! Thousands of tons of supplies 
our Government sends to the front every day. But they can't do 
everything at once, can they? It costs more than seven and a half 
million dollars to equip one division on infant^ with quartermaster 
and ordnance supplies. Where does the money come from ? Don't 
you forget it's the Stay-at-home Army that is buying Thrift Stamps 
and Liberty Bonds to pay for all this. They'll do it, but they can't 
make time, and it takes three months to make 90 per cent of these 
supplies. 

Toar. I'm converted, Preacher Bob! [Tie throws up his hands."] 

Bob. I know what a big job the American people are handling 
and I'm not going to howl for new clothes every other week. That's 
all. 

George. If I was in command of this army, I'd surrender before 
I'd send fellows back to the trenches in this condition. 

[A bugle call outs-ide startles them.] 

Tom. Fall in! 

Bob. We're going back to hare another try at them ! 

George. This is where I get the rest of the dozen bodies I promised 
my Dad ! [He jumps up, tcide-aioake, pulls off his shoes and flings 
them to Tom.] 

George [continues] . They're your size. We'll take turns. Hurry, 
fellows ! You'll find my gun on the bunk, Bob. Don't forget that 
chocolate ! Hooray ! We're going back ! 

[He rushes out excitedly. The others look helplessly at their 
empty hands and worn clothes. Then Bob^s resolution dawns.] 

Bob. All we need to lick them is Old Glory ! 

Tom. And each other. 

[They clasp hands. George returns disgustedly.] 

George. Shucks! 

Bob. What's up? Are we retreating or charging? 

George. Eesting ! Resting ! Order to fall in and advance on the 
quartermaster for supplies. Then six days of rest. Doesn't that 
make you sick ? 

Bob. Is everybody ordered to the quartermaster? 

George. There's enough for our Army and all the allies. From the 
looks of things, nobody in America is wearing anything — clean un- 
derwear without cooties — I saw it myself — miles of new uniforms 




16 WINNING THE WAR. 02g" , Jg™«»ilfflf 1 

and new trench boots lined with wool, and a Browning gun Unit will 
knock the " I " out of Kaiser ! 

[They slap each oilier joyously on /he hacks.'] 

Tom. Oh, you Stay-at-home Army! 

George. They're sure worth fighting for. 

Bob. Didn't I tell you that the folks at home would always 
carry on? 

Tom. Fall in ! 

[They grab the box, shoes, and writing materials, form a line, 
mark time, and march off whistling " The Star- Spangled Banner." 
The curtains are pulled immediately to reveal the living-room scene 
as before, with Mrs. Bailey finishing the letter.] 

Mrs. Bailey [reading] : 

We're all dressed up now and look as fit ns the day we marched down Fifth 
Avenue. But we know a lot more than we did then. We know that the Stay- 
at-home Army are as fine fighters as we are, and we can't win the war without 
you. So speed up and let's all work together to finish this job. 
Love, from 

Bob. 

Jane. I guess I'll go on with my knitting. 

John. Gee, I wish I could earn another quarter for a Thrift Stamp 
this afternoon. It might buy a new bayonet. Mother, do you think 
I could clean off the snow for Mrs. Perkins? 

Danny. I bet I'll save two shovels full of coal to-morrow. 

Mrs. Bailey. Shall we finish our letter to Bob and send it? 

John. Send that old thing! Not on your life! 

Jane. Oh, mother, it might make Bob and Tom think we didn't 
want to fight with them ! 

Danny. Tear up the silly thing ! Get to work, you other Thrifties. 
I'm going to stoke the furnace. 

Charlie. Mrs. Bailey, could Danny teach me how to stoke the 
furnace? 

Mrs. Bailey {smiling, sits by the table]. Yes, dear; but before yon 
children go I want to read a little stanza to you that I found re- 
cently, for I know that if we all learn it and believe in it my Stay- 
at-home Army will never again feel discouraged, as they did to-day. 
Now, listen while I read, and the first one who learns it will get a 
quarter for another Thrift Stamp. [She reads tlie following line* 
by Kipling:] 

It ain't the guns nor armament, nor fund that they can pay, 
But the close cooperation that makes 'em win the day. 
It ain't the individual nor the army as a whole, 
But the everlastin' teamwork of every bloomin' soul. 

[Curtain.] 

END. 

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